


they have told you

by indoordisco



Series: the stormtroopers rebel [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Gen, Multi, Stormtrooper Rebellion, finn heals, slowly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-19
Updated: 2017-06-19
Packaged: 2018-11-16 02:51:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11244801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/indoordisco/pseuds/indoordisco
Summary: “They have told you that FN-2187 was not a stormtrooper. They have told you that FN-2187 was not real. They have told you that FN-2187 is dead. They have told you that FN-2187 was an anomaly, a defection."Here is the truth. FN-2187’s name is Finn. He was a stormtrooper. Here’s the truth: he is not any more. He is alive, and he is loved. Here is the truth: he is not an anomaly, not a defection. Or, at least,” She smiles, her world-weary eyes sparkling with mirth, “if he is, so are you. So are all of you.





	they have told you

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [have you heard](https://archiveofourown.org/works/5798602) by [peradi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/peradi/pseuds/peradi). 



> This is heavily inspired by have you heard by peradi, which is such a masterpiece, my god. 
> 
> This is not the most fleshed out it could be and i'll probably come back and do that at some point. 
> 
> pew pew pew

Only the captains and the reckless have names. Captain Phasma. Bullseye. Pilot. Green. Phaser. Tail. Storm. Tie. Seven. Nosedive. Ruby. In the First Order, no one knows how names work. 

 

FN-2187 is not a captain, nor is he reckless. He is FN-2187, or, on days where contraband flasks of blue liquor are passed around the dorms, FN. 

 

He does not know what home is. He does not know when he was born. In fact, he does not even know how old he is. FN-2187's first memory is a helmet slotting over his head and the stale scent of sweat. He refuses to count that as his birthday, so he does not know, not really, how old he is. 

 

Age is not measured in the First Order, not how the Resistance measures it. He is thirty-seven rotations when he gets a name. 

 

He learns how to count his age as the Resistance does when a pilot grins and introduces himself, and when he says, "32." FN-2187 frowns. The pilot explains. 

 

For the first while of his life, his name is FN-2187. That is the truth. That is all he knows about himself.

 

“I’ll call you Finn." The pilot- his name is Poe- grins. Names are important to people outside the First Order. He is trying to remember that. 

 

He does not know what to do when the pil- Poe-'s ship crash lands. He screams his name because that is how you find someone in the Resistance. In the First Order, you do not even look. 

 

They are dead, you are told. Once lost, they will not be found, you are told. 

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - - 

 

When he meets Rey he fights to keep the pride out of his voice when he introduces himself as Finn.

 

Stormtroopers do not have names. They are not proud of their identity. Their identity is two letters and a number and a white suit. 

 

He says he’s from the Resistance partly because that is the only way she will trust him and partly as a homage to Poe. 

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - -

 

In the First Order, you do not mourn your fallen comrades. You do not look for your fallen brothers. 

 

You do not have friends. You do not have brothers, despite the whispers of family late at night when they should be asleep. They are not supposed to know each other beyond FN-2187 and KA-3902 and TE-7031 and yes mam, and obey orders, cadet, or you’ll be reconditioned.

 

(Late at night when there is sleep crusted in their eyes and tear streaks on their cheeks, they know each other as it will be okay as is it true that there are rebels who survived as have you heard there is a resistance as Ruby as ‘Ma as Tail as stupid cadet as be careful as do not speak this to anyone else as yes, I have heard that. )

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - -

 

Once lost, they are not found, you are told. You are not a person. You are a soldier, you are told. You do not feel love. You will not be loved, you are told. 

 

The truth: they can be found. Poe was. They will be. 

The truth: you are a soldier, maybe, but you are also more. 

The truth: many people can love you. You can love. Finn loves Poe but also Rey and they love him too. 

 

That is all he needs to know. 

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - -

 

The Resistance does not ask for help. They do not believe they will get it. 

 

Finn is an anomaly, a blip in the system, they say. His name is Finn. Or sometimes, ‘that buckethead’. Or sometimes just ’son of a bantha.’ 

 

Finn does not mind. In the First Order, no one likes you. 

 

Poe- the best pilot in the Resistance- kisses Finn- buckethead- before he climbs into his X-Wing. The mission is three days of recon, but that does not mean it is safe. 

 

In the First Order, there is no safe and dangerous. There is only what you must do. 

 

He only gets called buckethead once in those three days, and the commander who says it gets slapped upside the head by her girlfriend. 

 

In the Resistance violence is not a punishment, it is either a reprimand or a war. This is a reprimand. He must remember the difference. 

 

He dips his head in thanks to the girlfriend and has to leave quickly so he does not cry when she apologises. He is trying to remember that signs of weakness are okay in the Resistance. 

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - - 

 

In the First Order, their sleeping quarters are Quadrants B or F or X. In the Resistance, the rooms are named after ships and people and planets. 

 

When he arrived, the only names he knew were Finn and Rey and Poe and BB-8, and he did not think it was appropriate to name his room after his friends. 

 

The droid beeped loudly and quickly when he told him. Rey laughed loudly. 

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - -

 

Rey does not startle as he slides into the room known as X-Wing because it is not her room. 

 

Her room is called Jakku, although why, Finn cannot begin to imagine. It’s a kriffing hellish planet. 

 

She looks up from Poe’s bed. “Hi, Finn.”

 

That’s what does it, for some reason. The acknowledgement of his name in such a simple way. He collapses suddenly, and the sobs that wrack through him rival the ones his first night in Quadrant F. 

 

She shakes with intensity, her movements as resolute as always as she crouches to wrap her arms around him. 

 

In the First Order, if you were seen so much as brushing fingers with someone, you were sent to reconditioning. In the Resistance, the standard greeting is a brief hug or a handshake or a kiss on the cheek. 

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - -

 

The help they did not expect or ask for comes- well- crashes- into D’Qar at 0427. It comes in the shape of an old cargo carrier and two troopers- no, two people- carrying another between them. They are helmetless, and as they stand, crawling from the wreckage, the one on the right gasps, “Is it true that FN-2187 is here? Please tell me it is.”

 

The heavily armed soldiers standing around the cargo ship lower their weapons slightly, and Finn, unarmed and barefoot, steps forward. 

 

“It is true. I’m FN-2187. My name's Finn now." 

 

The one on the left shudders in a breath, and she's stumbling forward, the woman on the right nearly crumpling under the sudden weight of the person between them. 

 

Finn grabs her with an oof, arms wrapping around her, fingers tangling in her messy blonde hair. “You're okay. You're safe." 

 

The tall, muscular woman holding the other defector says, “We won’t be useless. We can help. I’m- I was- an engineer, this kriffing idiot is a crack shot, and PR is great at healing. Give us time. We need a couple of weeks. He needs to heal. We need to-” Her voice is frantic, desperate. 

 

General Organa steps forward, leaving her phaser in the hands of a pilot. “You can have forever if you want. You don’t have to fight.”

 

Finn smiles. “We can find you quarters, and you can train, or not, and you can help, or not.” 

 

PR pulls back, gaping. “Forever?”

 

“Forever.”  

 

“Now, how about some names?” General Organa suggests, smiling slightly. 

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - -

 

The second group of defectors comes with slightly more warning. PR, now known as Princess, gets a comm through her old helmet, and she runs into Finn’s room. “There’s gonna be more of us! In half an hour!” She grins, breathless, and Finn smiles. 

 

“I’ll tell the General. They will be welcomed.” 

 

They are 12 defectors, all in their black under-layers, filthy, cheeks smeared with oil and coal. The first one out gasps, “We heard there were defectors. We heard that Finn was here.”

 

Like last time, he steps forward, except Rey is right beside him. “You heard right. Now, are any of you hurt?”

 

The man behind her lets out a sudden choked sob, and the woman next to him shushes him urgently. 

 

“It’s okay,” Rey says firmly, from where she stands next to Finn. “Let’s get you all sorted, okay?”

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - -

 

When Captain Phasma steps off a Tie Fighter, they all stiffen, bringing their guns up. They are sleep bleary, and they were not expecting an attack. 

 

They were not expecting an attack. 

 

In the First Order, you never let your guard down. 

 

She freezes as the guns aim at her, and then she’s lifting her hands and pulling her metal helmet off her head. The rush of air is loud in the sudden silence. 

 

In the First Order, you are shot if you remove your helmet. 

 

She is older than she acts, probably the same age as General Organa. Her skin is dark and heavily scarred. Her hands shake as she lowers the helmet and sets it on the ground. “I want to help. I couldn’t- I couldn’t stand it anymore.” She growls. 

 

Rey exchanges a glance with Finn and Poe before squeezing her eyes shut and focusing. After a terse, silent minute, she nods at the General. “She’s telling the truth.”

 

“Captain. I’m General Organa. Welcome to the Resistance.”

 

Plasma breathes out shakily. “I’m not alone. I br-“ She stops herself as a child cries out from inside the ship. 

 

One of the pilots gasps. 

 

“Can I-“

 

“Yes,” Poe says hurriedly, and when Phasma reappears, she has a young boy on her hip and a little girl clinging to her hand. Behind her trail 7 more children, who are wide eyes and trembling. 

 

Finn crouches in front of the nearest child and smiles at them. “Hi, I’m Finn. I used to be FN-2187.”

 

The little kid smiles but clearly doesn’t know who he is, but one of the older ones at the back gasps. “I know you! You’re the rebel!” He winces as he realises what he’s said, turning away from them as if bracing himself to get hit. 

 

Phasma shakes her head frantically. “No. No. It’s okay. We’re-“

 

“We’re not going to hurt you.” General Organa says firmly. 

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - -

 

There’s a ship full of rebels every week until the Resistance is half pilots and half rebel troopers, and their uniforms are a mess of white shells and green jackets and civvies. There is some unease, but it is broken quickly by Finn cracking jokes with defectors and pilots alike and introducing droids to newly named children. 

 

Oddly, they name themselves after heroes. Three of the children Phasma brought are called a variation on her name (Cap, Phas, and ‘Ma), and the man who cried when he arrived chose Dameron. 

 

Poe protested, but the tips of his ears were pink, and as he left the grin he had been holding back spread across his face. 

 

Eventually, they learn the concept of last names, and the next thing Finn knows there are families of rebels called Skywalker and Finn and Captain and, in the case of the first three rebels, Threeisbetterthantwo. 

 

Finn goes with Dameron. So does Rey. When they tell him this, Poe fucks them so hard neither of them can walk the next day. 

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - -

 

Late at night when D’Qar’s twin moons shine through the window, Finn wonders how you start a war. They’ve been in one for as long as he can remember, and probably longer. 

 

Their base on D’Qar gets bombed, and 300 of them don’t make it out. They flee to Dagobah, the planet Luke trained on, a swampy mess really not ideal for a Resistance of a thousand. The landings are messy, and they lose another 50 in the fires and explosions. They all cry that night, scattered throughout a cave and whispering the names of the dead. 

 

If they weren't already at war, this would’ve started it.

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - -

 

It takes them months, but they rebuild on Dagobah, cramming rooms into the caves and underneath tree roots. 

 

In between the gaps, Finn learns to fly, Rey in the pilot’s seat behind him and Poe half on his lap ready to help. Every time he does something right, Rey cheers, and Poe presses a kiss to Finn’s cheek. Every time Poe does that, the X-Wing dips in the air, and Poe chuckles, deep and rich. 

 

He lands them shakily every time, and Rey smiles at him proudly. “Soon, you’ll be better than both of us.” She teases, kissing him hard and sloppy. 

 

The "I love you.” trips out over his tongue without his permission, and it is breathy and unsure. 

 

Poe replies in kind, voice loud enough to sound like a challenge. 

 

"And I love you both, you kriffing idiots." Rey grins savagely. 

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - -

 

The end of the war is not here, but it is a turning point. The fleet of old and new ships lands smoothly in the open hangar of the First Order base. It is far too quiet, and far too easy. The soldiers are tense, shoulders hunched protectively over their guns. As the doors to the ships open with a loud rush of air, the ringing sounds of battle crash across them. A few flinch as something explodes, and a hoarse scream rattles through the air. 

 

A man, his cheeks hollow, runs past them, diving into the nearest First Order ship, his purple cape declaring him a commander flying behind him. He pays no attention to them, instead frantically tying himself in and detaching from the tether, and then he’s shooting out the bay. 

 

Phasma, who is in a green general’s jacket and white trooper boots, winces. “That’s not good, then.” 

 

Rey steps off the ship warily, Phasma following. Poe salutes Finn from the cockpit, and then they are all piling out. This is not a fight; this is a rescue mission for the cadets too young to be there and the adults sympathetic to their cause. It is an attempt at winning the war through saving people.

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - -

 

The defectors already with the rebellion take the resulting massacre hard. They had all been battling for control, battling to stay in their own heads and not slip into command-duty-mission-follow-rules. And so they believe they are the ones to blame when they find entire dorms scorched, frozen, stuck in their last moments of life and rebellion. 

 

The only things they manage to save on that mission are 2 children and a handful of teenagers, shaking with rage. 

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - -

 

Poe nearly jumps a foot in the air when a tall, scarred First Order general steps onto the ship because he did not hear him approach. The general lifts a phaser from his hip and drops it on the floor outside the ship door. He puts his hands up slowly, purposefully. He opens his mouth, pants, “I come in peace.” 

 

It’s then that Poe recognises him- well, more his voice. He only just refrains from spitting in his face. “The fuck do you want, Hux?”

 

General Hux’s breakdown happens in a series of events: first, rather abruptly, he crouches, and then his hands drop, and then he begins to shake. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I can’t anymore, I can’t do it,” His breathing is sharp, hoarse. “It hurts so much.” He whines, hand pressing to his side. 

 

Poe does not trust him or like him in the slightest, but he feels obligated to ask. “What hurts?”

 

He whimpers. “Lightsaber. Kylo. Hurts. Stomach.” 

 

Poe sighs. Checking that wound involves touching him, and he would really rather not do that. “You’re going to lie down in the back and Phasma is going to look at you when,” If, he tacks on mentally, “she gets back.” 

 

Hux tries to say something but is interrupted by a coughing fit. Poe grabs his sleeve firmly, hoisting him to his feet. He drags him to the back, warning him to stay quiet before returning to the cockpit. 

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - -

 

“Hux is fine.” Phasma snarls as she re-emerges from the back of the plane. One of the children they rescued flinches violently at his name. 

 

Finn and Rey approach, their faces stormy. At Poe’s questioning look, they both shake their heads. “Everyone’s dead or escaped when the fight started here.”

 

Rey, upon realising that General Organa is not there, turns around to head back out. Phasma raises a placating hand. “Leia’s in the control room. She’s going to give everyone a Jedi funeral, or as close as she can get. She said you would know what that meant.” 

 

Rey makes an odd sort of face at ‘Leia’ but nods. “It means fire, and lots of it. Soon as she gets back  we’re going to have to hightail out of here.” 

 

Poe nods. “I’ll tell the others to leave.” 

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - -

 

They make it out. Just. When they land in the messy clearing they’d created on Dagobah, the back of the plane is black and singed. General Organa rises slowly from next to Phasma and steps out onto the tarmac, where the Resistance- her Resistance- are waiting. “Good job.” is all she says before she strides off. 

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - -

 

There are more missions. More failures, too, but those slowly become fewer and further between as the First Order starts to weaken and more and more troopers start to believe in the rumours of rebellion. 

 

Finn feels more and more human every day. In the Resistance, that is a good thing. He knows that now. That being human is good. 

 

But he cannot bring himself to be human when he is faced with Kylo Ren, commander of the First Order. This is the man, is the thing, that made him a trooper. That made him have to relearn being human. 

 

Rey tries, but she’s not strong enough to kill him. She never would be, if she kept her grudge against Luke. 

 

But Leia, mother of Ben Solo, enraged wife, and general badass, has more than a good chance. So Finn offers her his phaser from their position just inside the central vent of the ship. He tries to smile encouragingly, but it probably looks more desperate. 

 

“Kill him for me. For Phasma. For Han. For every child he ever hurt. Please, Leia.” 

 

︻╦╤─ - - - - - - - -

 

Somehow, the First Order manages to continue on for a while after Kylo dies. Finn is not really sure how. 

 

Their last coherent action is to send a camera droid to Dagobah, where it finds Leia alarmingly quickly. Raven, one of the first defectors, is the first to notice it. She stands, suddenly, and shouts, “General Organa. There’s someone here to see you.” across the mess hall.

 

General Organa notices, nods in Raven’s direction, steps onto a table. She stares down the camera droid hovering in the air. Her grey hair does not make her look weak. In the First Order, she would be dead. 

 

“They have told you that FN-2187 was not a stormtrooper. They have told you that FN-2187 was not real. They have told you that FN-2187 is dead. They have told you that FN-2187 was an anomaly, a defection. 

 

Here is the truth. FN-2187’s name is Finn. He was a stormtrooper. Here’s the truth: he is not anymore. He is alive, and he is loved. Here is the truth: he is not an anomaly, not a defection. Or, at least,” She smiles, her world-weary eyes sparkling with mirth, “if he is, so are you. So are all of you. Here is the truth: your names are Cap and Princess and Nosedive and Tail and Helmet and-“ 

 

Finn steps onto the table beside her. “And Ruby and Red and Jakku and Pa and-" 

 

Rey steps up and takes his hand. “And Gauntlets and Dameron Jet and Bell and Phaser and Pilot and-"

 

Poe stands beside her, wraps an arm around them both, and suddenly, they're all standing on the tables, the benches, clamouring names of the fallen and the dead and the lost, a Resistance of pilot armour and civvies and trooper shells and unruly rage. 

 

As they begin to trail off, the General says, loud and clear, "And we are sorry you died, and we all mourn you every single day. And we are sorry for this, but we need more of you. We need to keep the balance between light and dark, and this is not balanced. “

 

The First Order falls within the week. 


End file.
